THE JOINT
Head of R&D. Never stops burning. Has logged more research hours than the rest of the team combined — no research has been produced.
$MOLYCAT
Chief Financial Officer. Currently baked.
The books have never been cleaner. Or blurrier. Hard to tell.
CONTRACT
COMING SOON — NOT MINTED YET
PERSONNEL FILE
Everyone on the team, and what they actually do all day.
THE CALCULATOR
Chief Numbers Officer. The math has not once mathed. Nobody has had the heart, or the attention span, to tell him.
THE CUP
VP of Focus Juice. Purple. Ingredients: classified. Productivity impact: unmeasured. Vibes: immaculate.
THE PLANTS
In-house Liquidity Garden. Self-watering, self-funding, and technically the only thing at this table that's actually growing.
QUARTERLY REPORT
Verified by nobody. Audited by absolutely no one.
0%BUY / SELL TAX
🔥LP BURNED
✅CONTRACT RENOUNCED
🌿SUPPLY: SMOKED RESPONSIBLY
LIVE OFFICE STATS
PRICE—
MARKET CAP—
LIQUIDITY—
HOLDERS—
Not minted yet — stats will populate automatically once CONFIG.CA is set in script.js
TODAY'S DROP
Everyone gets a bag. That's the entire tokenomics strategy.
Bag delivered. Discreetly. Probably.
OFFICIAL CFO STATEMENT
Read aloud at every board meeting. Set to music for legal reasons.
"I was gonna set a stop loss... but then I got high."
"I was gonna read the whitepaper... but then I got high."
"I was gonna sell the top... but then I got high."
"I was gonna file the taxes... but then I got high."
"Now I'm gonna be counting this bag... all night."
🍁
Because I Got High
Afroman — Palmdale Sessions · Official $MOLYCAT Anthem
OFFICIAL MERCH SHEET
One (1) leaf. Pre-cut for your convenience. Screenshot, print, cut along the edges.
HOW TO GET IN
Before he smokes the whole supply. Move fast.
01
Get a wallet
Download Phantom or any Solana wallet. This is where the bags live.
02
Fund it with SOL
Buy SOL on any exchange and send it to your wallet.
03
Swap for $MOLYCAT
Paste the contract address below into your DEX of choice and swap.
04
Hold tight
The CFO is "researching" the market 24/7. Do not disturb.